BAM

So, sometimes you're just walking along enjoying the view and all of a sudden BAM! Life happens. It just kind of slaps you in the face. That's been my experience the last week that I've been here. I also have to admit, the monthly present mother nature gives me had a little (a lot?) to do with it. It's funny, because I was thinking back at Bikram yoga teacher training, and it was about the 4th week when shit got heavy, which is the same amount of time I've been here. I think I am starting to get lonely and searching in my head for what I remember "comfortable" feels like. Like my friendships. Some that are possibly lost. Tears, hugs and lots of thinking and writing has filled my last few days.
Now, I'm not saying it sucks here AT ALL. It's amazing here, I think it's just a natural rhythm of things coming up because I moved across the world. I've been making friends with the students and doing some other yoga styles. It feels good to be involved, although sometime I feel I just want to crawl in bed and shut out the world. Trying to stay positive amongst all the sadness in my head, feels like a never-ending battle. Like Mami says, sometimes it's good to just cry and be sad and understand that it's ok. Yes, Mami, I listen :)
I also know that everything that has surfaced for me recently, although painful, will help me grow in the end. There is a quote by someone (who I forget) that says something like this, "I love it when I am so far out of my comfort zone that I feel awkward and weird, because I know that at that exact moment, I am growing." This is what I keep telling myself. And I will not give up on my daily affirmations :)